Need I say more? ;)
Showing posts with label Funnies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funnies. Show all posts
Thursday, 20 October 2011
Shameless Plagiarism?
They say Plagiarism is the greatest form of a compliment to the original author. I hope this Special Columnist of a Chinese Daily will view my article this way. :)
This morning hubby shared with me 2 very interesting articles from this Columnist.
1. Steve Jobs passing is a great loss to the US.
US has lost 3 great talents in recent history - Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and most recent of them all - Steve Jobs. They've left a great void in the music, entertainment & technology industry. What is more ironic is that, their passing also reflected the plight of the American. With them gone, the Americans are also left "Jobs"-less, "Cash"-less and hence "Hope"-less (as in out of / no hope not that they're useless).
What a clever play of words.
2. Three Apples has changed the history of mankind.
1st Apple - The apple that Adam ate
2nd Apple - The Apple that fell on Newton's head
** Hubby went on to add - imagine if it were a durian / a coconut! Newton wouldn't have been alive to share his discovery! Of which I replied - Duh! Where got durian & coconut at the place where Newton was born-lah!?! Come to think of it, what's the biggest fruit that can come crashing down on him? Apple? Orange? Pears? None that can cause permanent head damage.
3rd Apple - The Apple that Steve Jobs co-founded
Sometimes getting this interesting articles 2nd hand via hubby; & I'm sure there's a lot of missing nuances & messages that got lost in translations; makes me wish I know how to read Chinese characters. :p
This morning hubby shared with me 2 very interesting articles from this Columnist.
1. Steve Jobs passing is a great loss to the US.
US has lost 3 great talents in recent history - Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and most recent of them all - Steve Jobs. They've left a great void in the music, entertainment & technology industry. What is more ironic is that, their passing also reflected the plight of the American. With them gone, the Americans are also left "Jobs"-less, "Cash"-less and hence "Hope"-less (as in out of / no hope not that they're useless).
What a clever play of words.
2. Three Apples has changed the history of mankind.
1st Apple - The apple that Adam ate
2nd Apple - The Apple that fell on Newton's head
** Hubby went on to add - imagine if it were a durian / a coconut! Newton wouldn't have been alive to share his discovery! Of which I replied - Duh! Where got durian & coconut at the place where Newton was born-lah!?! Come to think of it, what's the biggest fruit that can come crashing down on him? Apple? Orange? Pears? None that can cause permanent head damage.
3rd Apple - The Apple that Steve Jobs co-founded
Sometimes getting this interesting articles 2nd hand via hubby; & I'm sure there's a lot of missing nuances & messages that got lost in translations; makes me wish I know how to read Chinese characters. :p
Monday, 17 October 2011
Wouldn't you love to say this to someone?
Hahaha... Received this today. I wonder when I reach a ripe ol' age similar to this lady - will I be able to say it out without getting anyone offended? Afterall, people will then tend to dismiss me as a cranky old lady with too much time in her hands. :-p
Wednesday, 5 October 2011
Squeeze it!
Oh Gosh! This is just too funny not to be shared (not to mention a good de-stresser from work... hmm... there's still 3 people around me... what's wrong with these people!)
Friday, 2 September 2011
Satire - When China's President visits USA
I received this really funny comic satire on US's debt situation. It's actually quite bad considering it could be us next! Malaysia's debt is so high that my son will be working till old age & yet will not be able to pay that debt the government seem to be putting us in. Why should it matter to them when their children are already PRs of other countries. Sigh...
There's more. Check out at : http://www.fropki.com/obama-vt43507.html
Friday, 29 July 2011
Kun Sam's Adventure With A Toothless Grin
Last weekend hubby, Kun Sam and I travelled down to Melaka to visit my brothers & my very pregnant sister-in-law. We arrived just in time for lunch & we had Klang Bak Kut Teh (yea, I know... what am I doing having Klang Bak Kut Teh in Melaka? It's like having Penang Char Kway Teow in KL). All went well & Kun Sam was being an angel sitting straddled on my lap with my arms around him while we eat (note: we were careful with the hot soup - so no child negligence there... hmmm.... am I the only one paranoid on child safety here?). At times he looked at me & moves his mouth as if he'd love to have a bite / sip too. :-)
Through out the whole meal there were quite a number of people who walk pass us & most if not all of them would "greet" / wave at him the way most adults do whenever they see a baby; be it young / old / fair / dark / Malaysian / Bangladeshi - he seem to take this in his stride with no problem. Towards the end of the meal, my youngest brother took over to carry him & at the same time a lady working there walked over to play with him as well. Suddenly he cried so loud that he scare the lady away & not to mention grabbing the attention of all the restaurant patrons. He refused to stop crying & screaming even after I took over to carrying him & soothe him - which was really strange. He even burrowed his tiny head on my chest while continuing his wailing. Looking up at the lady who tried to play with him, I thought she looked normal enough....
Until..... she smiled and I noticed her whole front teeth were missing! LOL...
I know it's bad to laugh, at the risk of looking as if I'm laughing at her missing "assets". But I'm actually laughing (much restained ahemming actually) because I suspect my little similarly-toothless Kun Sam might be crying his head off because of that toothless smile!
He finally stopped crying (with some residual hiccups) when we paid the bill & made our way to the car. Upon reaching the car everyone was laughing & hubby said "What's the big deal Kun Sam? You had no teeth too!" Bro was a bit more nasty saying that she must have looked really ugly in his baby's eyes ("ugly" in the eyes of the beholder?) and.... he must be right because babies - like children, don't lie. **roll eyes** Nasty isn't it? I wasn't going to comment, for I may very well be the old lady with a toothless grin as well in future. I hope when that day comes, Kun Sam Jr is not going to scream his head off looking at grandmas toothless smile.
Through out the whole meal there were quite a number of people who walk pass us & most if not all of them would "greet" / wave at him the way most adults do whenever they see a baby; be it young / old / fair / dark / Malaysian / Bangladeshi - he seem to take this in his stride with no problem. Towards the end of the meal, my youngest brother took over to carry him & at the same time a lady working there walked over to play with him as well. Suddenly he cried so loud that he scare the lady away & not to mention grabbing the attention of all the restaurant patrons. He refused to stop crying & screaming even after I took over to carrying him & soothe him - which was really strange. He even burrowed his tiny head on my chest while continuing his wailing. Looking up at the lady who tried to play with him, I thought she looked normal enough....
Until..... she smiled and I noticed her whole front teeth were missing! LOL...
I know it's bad to laugh, at the risk of looking as if I'm laughing at her missing "assets". But I'm actually laughing (much restained ahemming actually) because I suspect my little similarly-toothless Kun Sam might be crying his head off because of that toothless smile!
He finally stopped crying (with some residual hiccups) when we paid the bill & made our way to the car. Upon reaching the car everyone was laughing & hubby said "What's the big deal Kun Sam? You had no teeth too!" Bro was a bit more nasty saying that she must have looked really ugly in his baby's eyes ("ugly" in the eyes of the beholder?) and.... he must be right because babies - like children, don't lie. **roll eyes** Nasty isn't it? I wasn't going to comment, for I may very well be the old lady with a toothless grin as well in future. I hope when that day comes, Kun Sam Jr is not going to scream his head off looking at grandmas toothless smile.
Friday, 11 December 2009
Where Does Women's Money Go
I received this funny video the other day. I think they should do another 1 for handbags.... ;-)
Friday, 10 April 2009
Najib's New Cabinet
Recently someone sent me this e-mail saying that she's attaching the pix of Najib's new Cabinet, so naturally I assumed it's the new Cabinet of Ministers appointed yesterday... Hmm.... Can't wait to find out. Until..........
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hahahaha..................
Some people ar.......
Friday, 27 February 2009
Always check your child's homework
This is so adorable. Goes to show how an innocent expression from a child can be misinterpreted by "dirty" minded adults.
Apparently this lady's daughter has to draw out what she wants to be when she grows up & this is the drawing:
Upon receiving a letter from the teacher commenting on the above picture, the mother respondedto the letter as follows:
Dear Mrs. Jones,
I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer.
I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week before the blizzard hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel we had, and then I found one more in the back room, and that several people were fighting over who would get it.
Her picture doesn't show me dancing around a pole. It's supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at Home Depot.
From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Smith
Apparently this lady's daughter has to draw out what she wants to be when she grows up & this is the drawing:
Upon receiving a letter from the teacher commenting on the above picture, the mother respondedto the letter as follows:
Dear Mrs. Jones,
I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer.
I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week before the blizzard hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel we had, and then I found one more in the back room, and that several people were fighting over who would get it.
Her picture doesn't show me dancing around a pole. It's supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at Home Depot.
From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Smith
Friday, 20 February 2009
Why Are There No Sitcoms on Accountants?!?
Outrage of all outrage! I have complaint & raved with Storm many an occassion that Accountants are really a bunch of sad fellows lar... We're even beaten by Housewives in the Sitcom race...
What am I ranting about? Well have you noticed that we've got sitcoms / serials on almost all the characters on earth, such as:
1. Friends
2. Lawyers
3. Police Officers / other types of law enforcers (FBI / CSI / CIA etc-etc)
4. Doctors
5. Housewives
6. Footballer's wives!?!?
7. Army wives
8. the Nanny!?!?
Even a Serial involving "NUMB3RS" are revolving around Mathematician.
Goes to show how low the status of an Accountant.... Yea... right below the Nanny / Footballer's wives! Everyone says accountants are boring... hey... look at Storm... Road Bully... Gangsta Mama...
Anyways, then I come across this article as a joke (be warned, it's going to be long....). On second thoughts, I think I'll post in a separate post. Then you can decide whether you want to read it or not.
p/s: Accountants / Finance professionals... It's a very sad definition indeed. Read at your own risk... :-p
What am I ranting about? Well have you noticed that we've got sitcoms / serials on almost all the characters on earth, such as:
1. Friends
2. Lawyers
3. Police Officers / other types of law enforcers (FBI / CSI / CIA etc-etc)
4. Doctors
5. Housewives
6. Footballer's wives!?!?
7. Army wives
8. the Nanny!?!?
Even a Serial involving "NUMB3RS" are revolving around Mathematician.
Goes to show how low the status of an Accountant.... Yea... right below the Nanny / Footballer's wives! Everyone says accountants are boring... hey... look at Storm... Road Bully... Gangsta Mama...
Anyways, then I come across this article as a joke (be warned, it's going to be long....). On second thoughts, I think I'll post in a separate post. Then you can decide whether you want to read it or not.
p/s: Accountants / Finance professionals... It's a very sad definition indeed. Read at your own risk... :-p
This Is What We Do When We're Stressed...
Old story, but I was unable to locate the picture & now tht I found it, I can finally tell my story.
Last September, we receive an e-mail with the following adorable picture in conjunction with National Girlfriends Day. Coincidentally we have just watched the movie "Don't Mess With the Zohan" tht has scenes where Adam Sandler gives "special treatment" to all the old ladies in town after each shampoo session at the Saloon where he works. Thus, I started by commenting :
Fern: Does this pix reminds u of something..... (hint = FOC "extra" service after shampooing)
Storm: Hahahaha!! That's exactly what I thought when I saw this pic earlier.....
Don't make fun of them, Fern, this could be us in the future....THE THREE OLD HAGS!!!
Road Bully: This is definitely the 3 of us la. I'm the sane looking one in the middle, Fern is the kindly looking one on the right...and ML is the psycho looking one with the evil glint in her eye, on the left....
Storm: HAHHAHAHHAAHA!!!!!
OMG, u seriously sent Fern and I into fits of CLM laughter!!!
Hey the middle one doesn't look so good either k!!....just tht she has a quiet simmering insane look, while mine is an outright blatant demented look.
Ur quite spot on with the Fern hag though, she looks really kindly..... =p
Road Bully: ok la..so we agree that both of us are the psycho ones who'd go for movies called "4bhia", and "midnite meat cleaver", while Fern is there to keep us in check...
So Storm, I hold you to your words that you are blatantly demented ok.... So don't bother defending your actions lar... Beyond recovery.... Hahahaha.....
Last September, we receive an e-mail with the following adorable picture in conjunction with National Girlfriends Day. Coincidentally we have just watched the movie "Don't Mess With the Zohan" tht has scenes where Adam Sandler gives "special treatment" to all the old ladies in town after each shampoo session at the Saloon where he works. Thus, I started by commenting :
Fern: Does this pix reminds u of something..... (hint = FOC "extra" service after shampooing)Storm: Hahahaha!! That's exactly what I thought when I saw this pic earlier.....
Don't make fun of them, Fern, this could be us in the future....THE THREE OLD HAGS!!!
Road Bully: This is definitely the 3 of us la. I'm the sane looking one in the middle, Fern is the kindly looking one on the right...and ML is the psycho looking one with the evil glint in her eye, on the left....
Storm: HAHHAHAHHAAHA!!!!!
OMG, u seriously sent Fern and I into fits of CLM laughter!!!
Hey the middle one doesn't look so good either k!!....just tht she has a quiet simmering insane look, while mine is an outright blatant demented look.
Ur quite spot on with the Fern hag though, she looks really kindly..... =p
Road Bully: ok la..so we agree that both of us are the psycho ones who'd go for movies called "4bhia", and "midnite meat cleaver", while Fern is there to keep us in check...
So Storm, I hold you to your words that you are blatantly demented ok.... So don't bother defending your actions lar... Beyond recovery.... Hahahaha.....
Thursday, 19 February 2009
Top 10 Disasters in 2009
Let's count down the Top 10 Disasters in 2009 - Year of the Ox (& it's only Feb! Yikes!) :
10. I fell sick on the eve of CNY
9. Hubby fell sick on 1st Day of CNY
8. My water container that was faithfully in service for the past 5-yrs cracked & spilt water all over the dining area
7. I had a massive / terrible back ache (but my fault, have not got proper typist chairs for working at home)
6. The kitchen sink was leaking water & can't be used for 2 whole weeks
5. The pipe of the apartment block tht converged at the ground floor was blocked because someone with no civic conscience threw plastics, wafer wrappers & tissue covers into the pipe! So when the cleaners in the apartment above us were cleaning & huge amount of water went through the blocked pipe, it all decided to "spew" out through the kitchen sink & semi flooded the hse (thank goodness it didn't flow into my bedroom / the study room where I work), but the smell was foul!
4. My laptop seem to develop some extra-sensory capabilities to know exactly when to crash / hang / not respond / drop connection / just plain slow.... When it's time to deliver something to my boss on the day I work fr home! (It NEVER happens in office)
3. Hubby dearest develop a sore-throat (poor thing....)
2. I develop another flu / cough / sore-throat (& all tht w/out even touching mandarine oranges / indulge in CNY cookies!) - must be from hubby not-so-dearest germs ;-)
1. I'm still not pregnant!!!!
10. I fell sick on the eve of CNY
9. Hubby fell sick on 1st Day of CNY
8. My water container that was faithfully in service for the past 5-yrs cracked & spilt water all over the dining area
7. I had a massive / terrible back ache (but my fault, have not got proper typist chairs for working at home)
6. The kitchen sink was leaking water & can't be used for 2 whole weeks
5. The pipe of the apartment block tht converged at the ground floor was blocked because someone with no civic conscience threw plastics, wafer wrappers & tissue covers into the pipe! So when the cleaners in the apartment above us were cleaning & huge amount of water went through the blocked pipe, it all decided to "spew" out through the kitchen sink & semi flooded the hse (thank goodness it didn't flow into my bedroom / the study room where I work), but the smell was foul!
4. My laptop seem to develop some extra-sensory capabilities to know exactly when to crash / hang / not respond / drop connection / just plain slow.... When it's time to deliver something to my boss on the day I work fr home! (It NEVER happens in office)
3. Hubby dearest develop a sore-throat (poor thing....)
2. I develop another flu / cough / sore-throat (& all tht w/out even touching mandarine oranges / indulge in CNY cookies!) - must be from hubby not-so-dearest germs ;-)
1. I'm still not pregnant!!!!
Killing Me Softly.....
Strumming my pain with VPN....
Wringing my life with its sluggishness....
Killing me softly with Excel....
Killing me softly.....
With it's curse.....
Tearing my whole life....
With its pace...
Killing me softly...............
When it hangs.....
I felt all flushed with fever
All stressed up from the wait
I felt it sapped my spirits
& made me curse out loud....
I prayed tht it would start-up...
But it just kept right on.....
Strumming my pain with VPN.... Wringing my life with its sluggishness.... Killing me softly with Excel.... Killing me softly..... With it's curse.....
Tearing my whole life....
With its pace...
Killing me softly...............
When it hangs.....
Sigh.... crazy? I know... childish? sort of... but wht am I to do as I wait for my to retrieve my excel from the network? vent out lar... Not therapeautic, but who else can I vent to? My poor labrador (& a stuffed-toy 1 too)?
Wringing my life with its sluggishness....
Killing me softly with Excel....
Killing me softly.....
With it's curse.....
Tearing my whole life....
With its pace...
Killing me softly...............
When it hangs.....
I felt all flushed with fever
All stressed up from the wait
I felt it sapped my spirits
& made me curse out loud....
I prayed tht it would start-up...
But it just kept right on.....
Strumming my pain with VPN.... Wringing my life with its sluggishness.... Killing me softly with Excel.... Killing me softly..... With it's curse.....
Tearing my whole life....
With its pace...
Killing me softly...............
When it hangs.....
Sigh.... crazy? I know... childish? sort of... but wht am I to do as I wait for my to retrieve my excel from the network? vent out lar... Not therapeautic, but who else can I vent to? My poor labrador (& a stuffed-toy 1 too)?
Thursday, 4 December 2008
'A' for Aliens, 'A' for Anniversary
I was having a tough time figuring out what to get for my hubby for our 4th Wedding Anniversary. The normal tie / pen doesn't work cos' he works in the refinery! He doesn't need a tie / a fancy pen...
wallet - he has 2 (1 using & 1 in the drawer)
belt - he has lots (bought during our trip to Chiang Mai)
shoes - a boot full
sandals - 1 will suffice for him
perfume - for a guy who says "natural sweat smell is manly"? I don't think so.....
leather jacket - I can't even get him on long sleeve / long pants... I doubt he'll ever use the jacket
cufflinks - to be used for his refinery safety jacket? hmmm.....
Aaahhhhh....... What do I get for him?!?!
Then a spark of inspiration hit me... I came across a shop in Berjaya Times Square selling collection items for all sorts of action figures. Most importantly, they are cheaper than the other shops I've come across. Cool.... I know he'd love it!
StarWars - nah.... he's not a fan
Indiana Jones - he likes the movie, but Harrison Ford action figure doesn't look cool enough
Terminator - another of hubby's favourite but it's the human version.... I want the "naked" terminator. Errr.... I mean terminator where you can see the robot inside... not the naked Arnold - puhleeezzzzz.....
Then.... aha! Alien vs. Predator! Lovely.......
The Aliens are damn ugly but cool.... you can see the sinews of the alien muscle, bone structures, odd shaped head - all in all, very detailed / intricate figurine...
The Predator is just as ugly if not worse... but juzz as cool...
Problem - There are at least 3 versions of Predators, 2 versions of Aliens & 1 what the shopkeeper call as "Predalion" - apparently it's the hybrid of Aliens vs Predator (you'll be shocked to find out tht the shopkeeper who tells me this is an auntie with a late 20's / early 30's son!)
Errr.... am no AVP expert... I cringe / close my eyes at least 50% of the whole movie (or rather a series of them)! I'll accept the "expert's" advise on what is alien / predator / predalien (although she's in the form of an auntie around my mother's age!)
What did I finally buy?
1 x 18" Alien
1 x smaller (can't remember d dimension) Alien
1 x Predator (same size as the small alien)
1 x Predalien (same size as the small alien)
though the poor predator will be surrounded by aliens, but can't help it! The Aliens looked so much Cooler....
I know my mum-in-law will freak if she sees this gift (she's alwiz saying tht looking at ugly stuff especially when you're pregnant - the baby will look like tht ugly stuff... Baby Alien spawned by a Human? yikes!). Let's hope it not the case.... (if I ever get pregnant...)
wallet - he has 2 (1 using & 1 in the drawer)
belt - he has lots (bought during our trip to Chiang Mai)
shoes - a boot full
sandals - 1 will suffice for him
perfume - for a guy who says "natural sweat smell is manly"? I don't think so.....
leather jacket - I can't even get him on long sleeve / long pants... I doubt he'll ever use the jacket
cufflinks - to be used for his refinery safety jacket? hmmm.....
Aaahhhhh....... What do I get for him?!?!
Then a spark of inspiration hit me... I came across a shop in Berjaya Times Square selling collection items for all sorts of action figures. Most importantly, they are cheaper than the other shops I've come across. Cool.... I know he'd love it!
StarWars - nah.... he's not a fan
Indiana Jones - he likes the movie, but Harrison Ford action figure doesn't look cool enough
Terminator - another of hubby's favourite but it's the human version.... I want the "naked" terminator. Errr.... I mean terminator where you can see the robot inside... not the naked Arnold - puhleeezzzzz.....
Then.... aha! Alien vs. Predator! Lovely.......
The Aliens are damn ugly but cool.... you can see the sinews of the alien muscle, bone structures, odd shaped head - all in all, very detailed / intricate figurine...
The Predator is just as ugly if not worse... but juzz as cool...
Problem - There are at least 3 versions of Predators, 2 versions of Aliens & 1 what the shopkeeper call as "Predalion" - apparently it's the hybrid of Aliens vs Predator (you'll be shocked to find out tht the shopkeeper who tells me this is an auntie with a late 20's / early 30's son!)
Errr.... am no AVP expert... I cringe / close my eyes at least 50% of the whole movie (or rather a series of them)! I'll accept the "expert's" advise on what is alien / predator / predalien (although she's in the form of an auntie around my mother's age!)
What did I finally buy?
1 x 18" Alien
1 x smaller (can't remember d dimension) Alien
1 x Predator (same size as the small alien)
1 x Predalien (same size as the small alien)
though the poor predator will be surrounded by aliens, but can't help it! The Aliens looked so much Cooler....
I know my mum-in-law will freak if she sees this gift (she's alwiz saying tht looking at ugly stuff especially when you're pregnant - the baby will look like tht ugly stuff... Baby Alien spawned by a Human? yikes!). Let's hope it not the case.... (if I ever get pregnant...)
Tuesday, 25 November 2008
Tennis Fever....
Nope sadly it's not me having tennis fever. It's abt Storm (again...)
Well, ever since she caught this interview with Roger Federrer after he lost to Nadal (did I get the spelling right? Argh.... who cares); she's been Roger this... Roger tht.... Reminds me of my schooling days in SMSTSSS when everyone had soccer fever... Girls going goo-goo-gaa-gaa over Redknap (again I dunno d right spelling) & I clearly remember Didie pining after McManaman (dunno if I got tht spelling right or not also); while I'll be teasing tht he's not cute at all - wht with the gangly daddy-long-legs stature. I'm digressing yet again... back to present...
So, our dear Storm was determined to pick up tennis as a sport (which she did after office - i.e. 12midnight!). However, Wolverine (her ex) is smart in suggesting tht maybe she should try playing the Wii version of tennis first before moving to the real thang... which she did... & guess what! She sprained her elbow (imagine the eyes popping out of socket like the scene from "The Mask" for effect plzzz)! Whoever sprains his / her elbow playing tennis on Wii?!? Pray tell if you found someone else other than Storm... :-)
Recently, Storm even bought tickets to watch Roger (yeap! we're on 1st name basis now) play at Bukit Jalil Stadium. We were joking tht Storm would just throw herself at Roger in excitement & Gangsta Mama added the drama by saying "yea! Roger will spank her with his tennis racket & she'll get 1 of her butt-cheek stuck to it!". Storm looked dreamy eyed to this - "Ahhh..... I don't mind if I can get closer to Roger....." errr.... duh.....
On the night of the match, she was so excited tht she accidentally sent me an old sms tht she saved in her outbox. A few seconds later she sent another sms saying she was so excited watching Roger play tht she pressed on the wrong button & send the old sms to me (eyes rolling out of my sockets then). I then replied "It's ok to press the wrong buttons for your h/p, but make sure you don't push the wrong 'buttons' on Roger..." *wink* *wink*
Well, ever since she caught this interview with Roger Federrer after he lost to Nadal (did I get the spelling right? Argh.... who cares); she's been Roger this... Roger tht.... Reminds me of my schooling days in SMSTSSS when everyone had soccer fever... Girls going goo-goo-gaa-gaa over Redknap (again I dunno d right spelling) & I clearly remember Didie pining after McManaman (dunno if I got tht spelling right or not also); while I'll be teasing tht he's not cute at all - wht with the gangly daddy-long-legs stature. I'm digressing yet again... back to present...
So, our dear Storm was determined to pick up tennis as a sport (which she did after office - i.e. 12midnight!). However, Wolverine (her ex) is smart in suggesting tht maybe she should try playing the Wii version of tennis first before moving to the real thang... which she did... & guess what! She sprained her elbow (imagine the eyes popping out of socket like the scene from "The Mask" for effect plzzz)! Whoever sprains his / her elbow playing tennis on Wii?!? Pray tell if you found someone else other than Storm... :-)
Recently, Storm even bought tickets to watch Roger (yeap! we're on 1st name basis now) play at Bukit Jalil Stadium. We were joking tht Storm would just throw herself at Roger in excitement & Gangsta Mama added the drama by saying "yea! Roger will spank her with his tennis racket & she'll get 1 of her butt-cheek stuck to it!". Storm looked dreamy eyed to this - "Ahhh..... I don't mind if I can get closer to Roger....." errr.... duh.....
On the night of the match, she was so excited tht she accidentally sent me an old sms tht she saved in her outbox. A few seconds later she sent another sms saying she was so excited watching Roger play tht she pressed on the wrong button & send the old sms to me (eyes rolling out of my sockets then). I then replied "It's ok to press the wrong buttons for your h/p, but make sure you don't push the wrong 'buttons' on Roger..." *wink* *wink*
Shopping Funnies
Lately I have been going on shopping sprees with Ms Storm - weekdays & weekends. Weekdays is whenever we got sick & tired of work & wants out. Weekends is whenever hubby dearest goes for his weekly hair treatment (& whenever Ms Storm can drag her ass out of bed before 12noon!).
One of the funniest incidents was when we found a dinner wear on 70% discount. There's 1 dress tht I particularly liked, but they only had size 'M' available. I doubt I can fit into it, so I replaced it on the rack, but Ms Storm as usual was 'brilliant' in her advice; said tht some size 'M' are huge, so I "might" just fit into it.
Oh well... No harm trying....
I got the dress down just nice all right but I can't zip up, so back to the racks... errr... but wait a minute.... why can't I get it pass my shoulders now.... hmmmm.... let's try downwards.... oh no, it's stuck at my hips.... How did I get in & can't get out? It's a puzzlement... Maybe it's my bra? So I removed it & still found the dress stuck at my shoulders. I knew then I need to get help fr Ms Storm so tht I can stretch my arms to the front & try to "arrow" my shoulders so tht it's less wide; while she pulls the dress out of me.
Darn! but I have no pants to put on because I was wearing a dress thinking tht it's easier to shop when I have only 1 article of clothing to remove. Now it's working against me - I don't have any pants to put on! Oh to hell with it! It's better than tearing this dress & having to pay RM100+ for a torn dress!
Storm? Storm? Oh Storm.........? I peered out the fitting room door & can't find her anywhere. Where did she go?!? I'm doomed.... Then a knock on the door.... Drat! Not the sales girl I hope... I cracked open the fitting room & what a relief to see Storm's face (I think tht is the only time I'll ever be relieved to see Storm... hahahaha....) Anyway, I told Storm of my predicament, got her into the fitting room (with me trying my best to cover my "modesty"), pulled the darn clothing over my head (phew.... wht a relief!) & practically pushed Storm out immediately after!
We were laughing all the way after tht (causing quite a few stares in the process) & Storm naturally insists tht this has to be documented in my blog (since I've caused enough embarrassment documenting her antics). Oh well.... think this is mild compared wht you normally do Storm... So I don't mind...
Oh, but before I end; I can't help putting in another Storm's antics from this shopping trip. Guess why Storm was missing when I first called for help? Well, Storm has a HUGE black handbag (tht she tortures & fill it up till the shape is all contorted) & while waiting for me, she made a turn somewhere near a mannequin, accidentally swings her HUGE handbag & knocked the hand (wrist downwards) off! She tried to fix it back, but the hand can't seem to be fixed back in place. Finally she left it right next to the mannequin's feet. As the mannequin is modeling a long evening gown, the wrist of the hand is covered, so from the view of any passers-by, the mannequins seem to have 3 feet!
Storm... I think we'll be banned from the shop in future lar with wht we did tht day... Probably a CCTV picture distributed to all staff to "shoo" at sight! :-p
More Shopping Funnies to come when I can write again....
One of the funniest incidents was when we found a dinner wear on 70% discount. There's 1 dress tht I particularly liked, but they only had size 'M' available. I doubt I can fit into it, so I replaced it on the rack, but Ms Storm as usual was 'brilliant' in her advice; said tht some size 'M' are huge, so I "might" just fit into it.
Oh well... No harm trying....
I got the dress down just nice all right but I can't zip up, so back to the racks... errr... but wait a minute.... why can't I get it pass my shoulders now.... hmmmm.... let's try downwards.... oh no, it's stuck at my hips.... How did I get in & can't get out? It's a puzzlement... Maybe it's my bra? So I removed it & still found the dress stuck at my shoulders. I knew then I need to get help fr Ms Storm so tht I can stretch my arms to the front & try to "arrow" my shoulders so tht it's less wide; while she pulls the dress out of me.
Darn! but I have no pants to put on because I was wearing a dress thinking tht it's easier to shop when I have only 1 article of clothing to remove. Now it's working against me - I don't have any pants to put on! Oh to hell with it! It's better than tearing this dress & having to pay RM100+ for a torn dress!
Storm? Storm? Oh Storm.........? I peered out the fitting room door & can't find her anywhere. Where did she go?!? I'm doomed.... Then a knock on the door.... Drat! Not the sales girl I hope... I cracked open the fitting room & what a relief to see Storm's face (I think tht is the only time I'll ever be relieved to see Storm... hahahaha....) Anyway, I told Storm of my predicament, got her into the fitting room (with me trying my best to cover my "modesty"), pulled the darn clothing over my head (phew.... wht a relief!) & practically pushed Storm out immediately after!
We were laughing all the way after tht (causing quite a few stares in the process) & Storm naturally insists tht this has to be documented in my blog (since I've caused enough embarrassment documenting her antics). Oh well.... think this is mild compared wht you normally do Storm... So I don't mind...
Oh, but before I end; I can't help putting in another Storm's antics from this shopping trip. Guess why Storm was missing when I first called for help? Well, Storm has a HUGE black handbag (tht she tortures & fill it up till the shape is all contorted) & while waiting for me, she made a turn somewhere near a mannequin, accidentally swings her HUGE handbag & knocked the hand (wrist downwards) off! She tried to fix it back, but the hand can't seem to be fixed back in place. Finally she left it right next to the mannequin's feet. As the mannequin is modeling a long evening gown, the wrist of the hand is covered, so from the view of any passers-by, the mannequins seem to have 3 feet!
Storm... I think we'll be banned from the shop in future lar with wht we did tht day... Probably a CCTV picture distributed to all staff to "shoo" at sight! :-p
More Shopping Funnies to come when I can write again....
Friday, 21 November 2008
Sigh.... Storm's Quirks
I think this is not the first time I said tht I need to change this blog into "Storm's Quirks" rather than "Fern's Quirks"! I'm writing almost all about her quirks here & I'm going to post another 1 now! Sigh... The unfairness of it all.
Let's see where to start? There are so many.....
1. She likes it "hard & rough"
OK.... Before any of you go anywhere near 18SX, pls take your mind off the dumpster & read first (or izit just me having my mind in the gutters? blame it on my hubby! I'm innocent! HA!). Anyways, to those close to dear Ms. Storm, we know she hates the drumstick because, in her words, "it tastes so oily & slimy & smooth, it's disgusting". Some new friends tht join us for lunch then queried her further; "what about beef / lamb?" Of which she answered tht she only takes the lean meat & cut away the fat. Gangsta Mama & I must have sent everyone else in the lunch group in silent shock when we said "In summary, she likes her 'meat' hard & rough!"... OMG... The 18SX connotation from tht 1 sentence!
2. Pastis, Tennis & Coke?
You must be wondering what does all the above words have in common. None whatsoever if not for the fact tht there were some really "damaging misunderstanding" due to some hearing problem / bad pronunciations (the reason for the misconception depends on whether the person is the listener / the speaker. Naturally the speaker aka Ms. Storm will say tht it's the listeners tht's having hearing problem). Anyway, back to the topic. So 1 day, Ms Storm suggested tht we should do lunch at the Gardens MidValley in a cafe called "Pastis". I did a double take & said "What?!?!?! Testis for lunch!" Ms Storm then had to spell it out for me & as mentioned earlier, both parties claim to be the innocent & it's the other party's error. For this case though, I can proudly claim tht it is definitely in Ms. Storm's pronunciation, because she repeated tht to several other ppl (Gangsta Mama & Road Bully included) & all of them heard the same word as I did...
Some time later, we were talking about tennis because Storm has a crush on Roger Federrer lately & has been following the progress of the tennis matches. When she mentioned the word "tennis", somehow all of us heard the word "penis" & she started laughing her normal Storm hysterical laugh saying "What is wrong with you guys! First Pastis became Testis & now Tennis?!" To which the rest of us defended, "we told you it's your pronunciation, otherwise you won't have all of us hearing the wrong thing right.... We further speculated how wrong it will sound if we tried to say "I love playing tennis & balls" OR "I love playing tennis, but hate collecting balls" but it sounded like...... you fill in the blanks ;-)
Then only recently (lunch today in fact), we're at San Francisco Steak Hse having lunch with free-flow Coke / Sprite. This time Storm had some hearing problem when I said "Would like more Coke" & she burst out laughing. Puzzled I looked at her & she had to whisper over the table (cos' we had a male lunch partner in our midst). With a devilish glint in her eyes she said "I heard Cock" Oh Ms Storm.... you're so crass.... :-p
3. Never trust a translation for a Thai movie
As experienced by our dear Ms Storm (I seriously wonder why all this strange incidence happens only to her), she was bored & tried watching a Thai horror flick relying on sub-titles to understand the story. Needless to say, she stopped when the sub-title came in as "lonely girl seeks company of vegetable". How can a horror movie sound so "blue"? Only in Storm's world.
4. Rear-End Review?
Ms Storm was about to send a meeting invite to her supervisor to book time for her Year-End Review. Just before sending the mail out, she realized tht she accidentally typed "Rear-End Review" on the title. Talk about MAJOR Career Suicide Move (CSM)... (author is rolling her eyeballs in resignation)
5. Salmon Balls anyone?
Why does everything Ms. Storm says seem to have sexual connotations? Now, Ms Storm has developed a penchant for the Salmon roe (not the tiny ones, but the bigger ones the size of small necklace beads). Trying to tell me & Road Bully about her new "love" she said "I just love this Salmon balls. It's so squishy & juicy, it just bursts in my mouth! Yum!" It sounded SO dodgy... Granted, it might be just me & road bully purposely misunderstanding her, but.... but.... there are better words to use.... "Roe", Ms Storm... It's called Salmon Roe!
Opps.... I have more to share but hubby dearest is already waiting downstairs... I'll continue in my next article of "Sigh..... Storm's Quirks Part II". As usual, we can never finish her quirks in 1 sitting.... :-) Meanwhile, enjoy... Storm, you're welcome to "defend" yourself, but it's no use... :-p Others, if you see anyone defending Storm's actions, you know who she is....
Let's see where to start? There are so many.....
1. She likes it "hard & rough"
OK.... Before any of you go anywhere near 18SX, pls take your mind off the dumpster & read first (or izit just me having my mind in the gutters? blame it on my hubby! I'm innocent! HA!). Anyways, to those close to dear Ms. Storm, we know she hates the drumstick because, in her words, "it tastes so oily & slimy & smooth, it's disgusting". Some new friends tht join us for lunch then queried her further; "what about beef / lamb?" Of which she answered tht she only takes the lean meat & cut away the fat. Gangsta Mama & I must have sent everyone else in the lunch group in silent shock when we said "In summary, she likes her 'meat' hard & rough!"... OMG... The 18SX connotation from tht 1 sentence!
2. Pastis, Tennis & Coke?
You must be wondering what does all the above words have in common. None whatsoever if not for the fact tht there were some really "damaging misunderstanding" due to some hearing problem / bad pronunciations (the reason for the misconception depends on whether the person is the listener / the speaker. Naturally the speaker aka Ms. Storm will say tht it's the listeners tht's having hearing problem). Anyway, back to the topic. So 1 day, Ms Storm suggested tht we should do lunch at the Gardens MidValley in a cafe called "Pastis". I did a double take & said "What?!?!?! Testis for lunch!" Ms Storm then had to spell it out for me & as mentioned earlier, both parties claim to be the innocent & it's the other party's error. For this case though, I can proudly claim tht it is definitely in Ms. Storm's pronunciation, because she repeated tht to several other ppl (Gangsta Mama & Road Bully included) & all of them heard the same word as I did...
Some time later, we were talking about tennis because Storm has a crush on Roger Federrer lately & has been following the progress of the tennis matches. When she mentioned the word "tennis", somehow all of us heard the word "penis" & she started laughing her normal Storm hysterical laugh saying "What is wrong with you guys! First Pastis became Testis & now Tennis?!" To which the rest of us defended, "we told you it's your pronunciation, otherwise you won't have all of us hearing the wrong thing right.... We further speculated how wrong it will sound if we tried to say "I love playing tennis & balls" OR "I love playing tennis, but hate collecting balls" but it sounded like...... you fill in the blanks ;-)
Then only recently (lunch today in fact), we're at San Francisco Steak Hse having lunch with free-flow Coke / Sprite. This time Storm had some hearing problem when I said "Would like more Coke" & she burst out laughing. Puzzled I looked at her & she had to whisper over the table (cos' we had a male lunch partner in our midst). With a devilish glint in her eyes she said "I heard Cock" Oh Ms Storm.... you're so crass.... :-p
3. Never trust a translation for a Thai movie
As experienced by our dear Ms Storm (I seriously wonder why all this strange incidence happens only to her), she was bored & tried watching a Thai horror flick relying on sub-titles to understand the story. Needless to say, she stopped when the sub-title came in as "lonely girl seeks company of vegetable". How can a horror movie sound so "blue"? Only in Storm's world.
4. Rear-End Review?
Ms Storm was about to send a meeting invite to her supervisor to book time for her Year-End Review. Just before sending the mail out, she realized tht she accidentally typed "Rear-End Review" on the title. Talk about MAJOR Career Suicide Move (CSM)... (author is rolling her eyeballs in resignation)
5. Salmon Balls anyone?
Why does everything Ms. Storm says seem to have sexual connotations? Now, Ms Storm has developed a penchant for the Salmon roe (not the tiny ones, but the bigger ones the size of small necklace beads). Trying to tell me & Road Bully about her new "love" she said "I just love this Salmon balls. It's so squishy & juicy, it just bursts in my mouth! Yum!" It sounded SO dodgy... Granted, it might be just me & road bully purposely misunderstanding her, but.... but.... there are better words to use.... "Roe", Ms Storm... It's called Salmon Roe!
Opps.... I have more to share but hubby dearest is already waiting downstairs... I'll continue in my next article of "Sigh..... Storm's Quirks Part II". As usual, we can never finish her quirks in 1 sitting.... :-) Meanwhile, enjoy... Storm, you're welcome to "defend" yourself, but it's no use... :-p Others, if you see anyone defending Storm's actions, you know who she is....
Sunday, 4 May 2008
Turning Silver?
I know it may be a wee bit childish to wanna make a fuss over this but...
I found a strand of white hair on me!! - errr, ok let's rename it to silver - near the edge of my hairline! It's not obvious (cos' it's only a strand), but it's there! Yikes!
Well Storm... I may join your all silver hair fashion statement in some years to come (soon? Oh please no!).
I found a strand of white hair on me!! - errr, ok let's rename it to silver - near the edge of my hairline! It's not obvious (cos' it's only a strand), but it's there! Yikes!
Well Storm... I may join your all silver hair fashion statement in some years to come (soon? Oh please no!).
Thursday, 1 May 2008
Toby Dah-Ling!....
Some might be wondering who in the world is Toby? Another Storm / Gangsta Mama / Road Bully?
It is a nick name all right... but not for a person but a car! Trust Gangsta Mama to come across this bit of news...
Well, it all started when our dear fren in office who offered a ride to Gangsta Mama & frens to the Farewell Party we organized for Yus (as 'reported' in my earlier blog). I can't remember the details of what happened along the way, but I do know that this cute lady of ours had to exert her Proton Savvy; which then prompted a spontaneous remark "Sorry ye Toby..."
Naturally Gangsta Mama's eyes widen as large as saucers, wondering who the driver said sorry to. Errr.... Your car has a name?!? But out of all names, why Toby?
The response / explanation I got was most appropriate indeed & thereafter I always find it to be very cute & endearing. It stands for :
It is a nick name all right... but not for a person but a car! Trust Gangsta Mama to come across this bit of news...
Well, it all started when our dear fren in office who offered a ride to Gangsta Mama & frens to the Farewell Party we organized for Yus (as 'reported' in my earlier blog). I can't remember the details of what happened along the way, but I do know that this cute lady of ours had to exert her Proton Savvy; which then prompted a spontaneous remark "Sorry ye Toby..."
Naturally Gangsta Mama's eyes widen as large as saucers, wondering who the driver said sorry to. Errr.... Your car has a name?!? But out of all names, why Toby?
The response / explanation I got was most appropriate indeed & thereafter I always find it to be very cute & endearing. It stands for :
TOBY = proTOn baBY
A stroke of genius! :-)
Sunday, 20 April 2008
A Day At The Spa
Yesterday, Gangsta Mama, Storm & Myself went to the Andana Spa at Glenmarie. We bought some vouchers at RM120 which includes a 40minutes massage, free-flow food & drinks (which includes fresh fruit juices & Haagen Dazz Ice-cream), usage of the spa facilities (i.e. jacuzzi, steam bath, dry sauna etc) and the lounge area (with Astro, DVD players, flatscreen TVs, magazines, recliner sofas) - not to mention the royalty treatment!
As usual, when there's Storm, there's Blog material... I shudder at the thought of the length this blog is going to be in documenting our girl's day out... :-)
Firstly, on friday, when we plan on the Spa outing, I mentioned to Storm that I'm planning to bring my own massage lotion & asked her whether she wants to bring her own. She replied "Will cooking oil work?" with a wicked glint in her eyes (& an equally wicked smile)... Jeezzz... She's getting from bad to worse!
3rd highlight - After having more snacks & the quorum is now complete, we then went for our massage (since the spa facility is just up, I don't want to be the 1st to try if we'll be electrocuted - so safer to go for the massage first! LOL). Upon entering the room, we found 3 lady masseur - 2 slim ladies of China nationality & 1 local but about nearly 1.5-2 times my size. Gangsta & I got the slim ladies & Storm (just her luck) got the bigger sized lady!
We were stripped (quite professionally I must admit... we lie face down & extend our arms over our head, with minimal effort, they pull our loose camisole of our bodies) & our short was pulled half way down to expose our butt (yeah... they massage the butt too, but not the most comfortable of all places). The masseur was just starting for a few minutes when I had to turn up to speak to Storm's masseur cos' she's the only one there who can speak Cantonese & English (I'll explain the significance of this later...) The massage was good & all of us agreed that the massage on the neck & head region was SOOOOO Heavenly!
After the massage, as usual, Storm has her say of the experience (knowing Storm, I must warn that nothing should shock you by now... expect the most outrageous). Here goes:
As usual, when there's Storm, there's Blog material... I shudder at the thought of the length this blog is going to be in documenting our girl's day out... :-)
Firstly, on friday, when we plan on the Spa outing, I mentioned to Storm that I'm planning to bring my own massage lotion & asked her whether she wants to bring her own. She replied "Will cooking oil work?" with a wicked glint in her eyes (& an equally wicked smile)... Jeezzz... She's getting from bad to worse!
- Oh & I should also mention that towards the end of the outing when we were dipping in the jet / jacuzzi pool, she said "If I offer RM200 & dare you to bring the cooking oil for the massage, will you do it?" - trust Storm to come up with such questions... Anyway, I asked if I actually need to use the cooking oil in my massage; of which she replied "Of course! With RM200, it's more than enough to clean your back after that!" I think I rolled my eyes... & replied "Yeah... & pay thousands RM to clear the acne that formed on my back!?!"
3rd highlight - After having more snacks & the quorum is now complete, we then went for our massage (since the spa facility is just up, I don't want to be the 1st to try if we'll be electrocuted - so safer to go for the massage first! LOL). Upon entering the room, we found 3 lady masseur - 2 slim ladies of China nationality & 1 local but about nearly 1.5-2 times my size. Gangsta & I got the slim ladies & Storm (just her luck) got the bigger sized lady!
We were stripped (quite professionally I must admit... we lie face down & extend our arms over our head, with minimal effort, they pull our loose camisole of our bodies) & our short was pulled half way down to expose our butt (yeah... they massage the butt too, but not the most comfortable of all places). The masseur was just starting for a few minutes when I had to turn up to speak to Storm's masseur cos' she's the only one there who can speak Cantonese & English (I'll explain the significance of this later...) The massage was good & all of us agreed that the massage on the neck & head region was SOOOOO Heavenly!
After the massage, as usual, Storm has her say of the experience (knowing Storm, I must warn that nothing should shock you by now... expect the most outrageous). Here goes:
- I asked if the massage was ok for Storm since she got such a huge lady! My first impression was she would break Storm's bones. Storm's reply was the usual unconventional "Yeah! When I was told she'll be massaging me I was thinking - oh boy! She sure hope she's not a 'les' used to the masculine role!" errrr.........?
- "I got a little worried when I felt a drop of cold liquid on my butt! Oh no... I hope she's not drooling over my butt!" (since she has the wild imagination that her masseur is a potential 'les') someone really needs to do something with Storm's imagination! Gangsta mama? any suggestions?
- Remember when I told you at 1 point I spoke to Storm's massuer? Well, the first thing Storm asks after the massage was "Oh yeah! Did you see my butt when you looked up to speak to my masseur?" in a rather indignantly (a feigned one) I must add. double errrr......? Why in heavens do I want to peep at your butt Storm? Unlike your active imagination & assessment of your masseur - I would much rather remain straight thank you...
4th incident... We were watching the King & I - the Yul Brynner version. Both Gangsta mama & I agreed that Yul Brynner is definitely the more dashing & royal version of the King of Siam as opposed to the many other remakes / versions of the movie. Storm commented that it goes to show that her previous remark that footballer Zidane is "handsome" is not too far off the mark then... Since both Zidane & Yul Brynner are bald! I think both Gangsta mama & I gave up at this point...
Well Storm... Thanks again for the blog material. I hope my blog doesn't get banned despite some 18+SX stuff that you commented on. =)
Oh and before I leave, I would like to add that at the start of the spa, we have agreed to ban on topics related to Voldy. Despite our best efforts, Voldy is still being discussed sporadically. However, I would like to congratulate ourselves for being able to stop having Voldy from entirely invading our de-stress session & belief we have achieved what we came for. We're thoroughly de-stressed. Belief it or not, by the time we left, it was around 9+pm! That's a total of about 10hrs (at least for me... am really milking all my RM120 worth! =p).
Girls... We really should do this more often... Wouldn't mind extending the invite to the rest of the gals... Do tell me if you're interested & will make sure to call when we have another of our Spa session.
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